History Police found a decomposed body of History cut into 3000 pieces at the backyard of Sanjay Leela Bhansali's house. For Bhansali's fans, his backyard is a mix of red, purple and blue colour specially imported from women's planet WO452$43. It is totally an original colour on the mother earth. Ok! Back to the story, History Police immediately arrested Bhansali and took him to Patal Lok (hell).
"This Sanjay Leela guy has kept history in his house for past 20 years. Earlier he was a small kind of criminal, copying some old Bollywood or Hollywood movies converting them into some stupid strange versions by adding some new expressionless people, idiotic colours and weird sets just to show he was original. Every time he copies something from some great old movie, History lost her body parts. Now after many years of harassment, Bhansali finally cut her throat by directing Bajirao Mastani. Under Patal lok (hell) Penal Code (PPC) we arrested him to take to face the trial of Yam Raj," said Patal lok administrator Chitragupta.
Why did Patal Lok Police arrest Sanjay Leela Bhansali?
"Boss he showed Bajirao dancing like a Mawaali on the nukkad and dark Mastani incessantly staring for nothing. On top of that he showed Kashibai and Mastani are dancing, showing their bellies, underbellies and what not portions of their bodies. Boss, if he had slight amount of creativity, then I have creator (God) with me," said Chitragupta when India Satire correspondent asked him the reasons for taking Bhansali to Patal Lok
What will happen with Sanjay Leela Bhansali in Patal Lok?
Giving the details about how the justice is made in Patal Lok, Chitragupta told India Satire correspondent "See we can't take his life in Patal Lok as he received immortality way back 2000 years ago when Kali Yug began. However, we will do our best to castigate him if found guilty as per Patal Lok court. He will be fried in a dark red oily pan, boiled in green pressure cooker and roasted in yellow sandwich maker. His eyes and brain are not made to watch different colours and therefore we will put him in a tunnel with full of colours and make him think how it feels when somebody harasses the real history for the sake of showing few stupid dance steps with skinny bodies."
What will happen to him on the earth?
"There are many people on the earth who deserve watching contaminated histories. Just like a donkey roars and yells and still becomes biggest and most popular singer in the today's world," said Chitragupta "And therefore Bhansali's leela would still get commendation from the world. However, here in Patal lok 'ab toh wo gaya'."
How does Patal Lok look-a-like?
"Watch Dilwale's "Gerua" song to know how Patal Lok looks. That song is directly shot in Patal Lok with Shahrukh Khan (booked for a seat in Patal Lok) danced with Kajol and directed by Rohit Shetty (he also booked for a seat in Patal Lok) and sang by Arijeet Singh, permanent member of Patal Lok.
We only supplied them corpses of front part of MH-370 to shoot the song. That part was a sinful creature and took life of many people," said Chitragupta "And it will remain there while we are waiting for above-mentioned creatures to arrive at Patal Lok."
(Swati Gupta, our special correspondent added inputs of Patal Lok. She personally interviewed Chitragupta)
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